In the beginning, God created the bit. And the bit was a zero. On the first day, he toggled the 0 to 1, and the Universe was. (In those days, bootstrap loaders were simple, and “active low” signals didn’t yet exist.) On the second day, God’s boss wanted a demo, and tried to read the bit. This being volatile memory, the bit reverted to a 0. And the universe wasn’t. God learned the importance of backups and memory refresh, and spent the rest of the day (and his first all-nighter)...

1. You make more than they do. 2. No one knows or understands what you do, and when you try to explain it, they think you are trying to make them feel stupid. 3. You get to go out for lunch, while they sit at their desk and eat microwave vomit. 4. When you are at their desk, no matter how well you think you are hiding it, the shrine of cat pictures around their monitor turns your stomach. 5. Their boss is afraid of your boss. 6. After explaining to you for twenty minutes what their problem is and...

By Dean Chafee Here is a comprehensive list of what your email message goes through in order to get delivered: Virus Checks - The majority of virus (and worms) these days, travel around the internet by way of email messages. In order to protect valuable network systems from being attacked by a virus, most corporate networks and Internet Service Providers employ virus scanners that look for viruses and worms in much the same way that anti virus scans on your desktop computer. Most email...

1. When IT say they’re coming right over, log out and go for coffee. It’s no problem for us to remember 700 network passwords. 2. When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals, dried flowers, bowling trophies and children’s art. We don’t have a life, and we find it deeply moving to catch a fleeting glimpse of yours. 3. When you bring us your own no-brand home PC to repair for free at the...

20. Tell the caller that you went online pretending to be a transvestite: Had cybersex with Eddie Murphy 19. "Still not used to this whole electricity thing, huh? 18. Proclaim your undying love. 17. Advise the customer to lick the power supply. 16. "So, what are you wearing?" 15. Constantly refer to caller as "Stupid Pumpkin." 14. As you look up a part number, whistle loudly in a monotone. 13. "You've got to be kidding." 12. "What you do is get yourself $50 and go and buy a clue. 11. Use...

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington engineering mid-term. The answer was so “profound” that the Professor shared it with colleagues, and the sharing obviously hasn’t ceased… Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or Endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote Proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law, (gas cools off when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote...

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As Seen on Failblog.org This explains alot….